Shab-eBarat

I just got back from uncle Jamal Nasir’s house. He was a family friend, some one I really respected. In fact, I loved his whole family. His wife is MashaAllah so pretty and he has two sons and a daughter. His kids practically grew up before our eyes and they were all so well behaved MashaAllah. He had gone for Hajj this past year and his son had recently learnt the Quran by heart. When I first met him, he was like any other person his age. Then I saw him transform. He grew a beard and became very religious and I respected him more for it. He was, without doubt, one of my favorite uncles.

Ammi told me last night that Uncle Nasir passed away in Lahore due to liver cancer this past week.

It was Shab-e-barat last night and I stayed up and prayed. I offer my Maghrib, Isha, Tahajud and Fajr prayers on the roof because it’s pleasant and I get to see the stars and the moon. It was so beautiful last night. There are two schools of thought related to Shab-e-Barat. One is that our fate is written in this night. Another is that in this night, we should remember all the people who have left us and pray for their souls. As far as I am concerned I just see it as an opportunity to just talk to Allah ji, which is what I do anyways, but some moments are just special.

So, I prayed for my nana ji and nani. I think of my nani when I see the Venus around maghrib time. Everyone tells me I look like her, not pretty like her but I resemble her in my complexion and physique. I think my nana is the handsomest guy ever and also the best story teller. It was because of him that I believed in mermaids and a part of me still does. I miss them both so terribly. I miss Dadi Rahmat…I remember how fragile she was and how she couldn’t get up from the bed but every time she would see me, she would try so hard to…and I miss Auntie Zara. I have never seen a more courageous woman in my life. For as long as I could remember, I saw her weak and ill and I always saw her smiling. She left us last year, on my birthday. I see it as her day of deliverance.

I prayed for Ali Tahir, who was so lucky that he died in Madina and was buried in Makkah. I still remember him, his sense of humor and I remember his funeral in Masjid-ul-Haram. I prayed for Saad Zia…some one I met only once when I was a little girl but the memory is etched in my mind forever. I prayed for Madam Munawar, a teacher in PAF who used to start the daily assembly with ‘pyarai bacho’. I prayed for this chowkidar baba from PAF…I never learnt his name but I still remember him smiling at me standing at the school gates. I remembered saddy’s cousin Harris and I prayed that Allah be kind to him. I never knew him but saddy told me one day that he used to listen to this song ‘seasons in the sun’ and I have always associated that son with him. I prayed for auntie Nabila’s mother who used to call me ‘mera tara’ the only person who ever did. I remembered, these three old ladies from G-10 who were sisters and were always kind to me. The three of them passed away within a month of each other. I prayed for saira’s dad who used to offer me ‘jamans’ during NCC. And most of all I prayed for saddy’s dad. There have been very few people who have always been kind to me and Saddy’s father was an exception even amongst them. I remembered the time he was in hospital and I held his hand. I remember closing my eyes and praying that I could infuse some of my life in him. I prayed for him with all my heart. I remember him smiling at us before we were about to go in for our biology practical. And I remember meeting him in front of my office since his was next to mine. And finally I prayed for Uncle Jamal Nasir.
I prayed for all these people and asked Allah ji to be exceptionally kind to them as they had been kind to me in my life even though I had never done anything to deserve their kindness. They were all beautiful people whose years were truly and completely full of life.