My Last Post
Good Bye
I woke up yesterday as I got a frantic call from our DMT producer. Although I had turned off my cell, the fact that he called on my landline showed how worried he was. Junaid Jamshed was supposed to be our guest that morning but he cancelled at the last minute and we needed a substitute. And who can be a better substitute for a bearded fella then a lady who covers her head. So anyhoo, I rushed to the office without even changing my clothes. Anyhoo, for the first time, I was a guest on a show I myself help to produce. I hope NOBODY saw it.
Remember when the simple things were the things we loved
I wrote this back in my early University days. Everything was more interesting than studying Economics, thus this particular topic.
I found this in my old folders. I wrote it back in my B.A days, when i was probably 17/18 years old. Reading it today made me realize that i knew myself better in those days.
Saba and Usman got married yesterday MashaAllah.
There really is a first time for everything. And I guess in my profession, the likelihood of some firsts is more than in others.
Lately, my sleeping hours have diminished significantly. Last night I went to bed at nine and didn’t fall asleep till midnight. I then woke up at 4:30 for prayers and have been up since. All I did was stare at the light slowly filling up my room and the shadows created thus that moved across the wall. So when you have nothing to do but wait for sleep to come, what do you do? What does anyone do?
Yup! It’ that time of year again where the weddings take place like everybody is in a cosmic race to get to the finishing line marked by the words 'I do' and you stand on the sidelines in your finery and hope that someday soon you too shall saying the same words.
Romana was my classmate back in college. True to her name, she is the most romantic soul I have ever come across and she was the first person who made me think about what I wanted in a person. I still remember we were standing by the stairs during a break and she was telling me about her latest crush while I was rolling up my eyes and telling her to get real. (The crush by the way was Ibrar-ul-Haq). Anyhoo, she was surprised at my response and asked me very directly given my lack of interest in guys, if I ever wanted to get married. I told her of course I did. That’s part of our lives. She then asked me who my ideal was. No romantic story or icky digest novel…straight and frank. I had never thought about it before and I told her that. She asked me to tell her on impulse what would impress me. I thought about it for a minute and said I would want the person to be educated, religiously inclined, someone who preferred books over movies, listened to my kind of music, an athlete, preferably a boxer and played chess and tennis and could ride a horse as well, someone with a good career so that money would never be an issue but not ridiculously rich, someone who loved to travel and had a very good sense of humor, patient and able to calm me down. And if he were good looking with all that, it would be a certain plus. And after saying all this, I asked Romana to tell me honestly if such a man existed and if he really did by some miracle, wouldn’t he be crazy to marry me? And if there was someone that crazy, wouldn’t I be insane to marry someone crazy?
Why can’t some people understand when they are not welcome in your life, not even as mere shadows or well-wishers? Why is it that I am confronted with these ridiculous notions harbored by morons that when a girl refuses them, she is playing hard to get? Don’t they understand that if a girl wants somebody in her life, she does what she can to make them stay, not push them away? Why is it so hard for them to comprehend that when a girl likes someone, she likes them for the person they are and not for what they possess? Why can’t they realize it’s never a question of the lands to be acquired or the jewels to be owned but essentially of the life to be lived? Is it such an oddity for a guy to be refused on the basis of his lack of intellect? Has wealth really become the only yardstick for matrimony? And how dare I be threatened that I will regret my decision? Is it not my life to screw up?
You can put down your guitar now,
I never minded calling You a King
I am alone in the office...
Octopus is busted and therefore, I have nothing to do but sit and reflect. My ruminations started last night while I was praying as part of 27th Ramzan. While I was praying my thoughts were all jumbled up and I was trying to find some place to start. It was then that I realized that ten months of this year have lapsed, simply drifted into history. Last year during ramzan, I was a different person, I was a hopeful person. Now I am just wistful. I have so much to look back at and so much to forget. For one glorious evening, I was the luckiest person on this planet. I had a family that loved me, somebody marvelous who wanted me and most of all, I had faith. I remember that morning so vividly when I dressed up not because I wanted to look good or had some place important to go to but because I felt beautiful. I thought I had stumbled onto true bliss this year, it turned out to be a mirage. And it shook the very foundations of my dreams but then again, dreams never require foundations and never make a solid foundation for anything, do they?